So I have this image…
Of me, driving a cool Jeep Wrangler. There’s some stuff thrown in the back of it. Some boots, a tent, a cooler. Bike rack on the back holds a bike. Hell, why not even toss in some imaginary fishing poles or something.
“Outdoorsy” is the picture I am trying to paint. You know.. of a person who could go sleep in the woods for a weekend. Hiking, biking, generally being all “one with nature” and stuff like that.
I have had this image of this “me” for many years. A me that is woods savvy. A me that could spend the weekend out in wild. No showering or shaving… peeing in the woods. That kind of thing.
But the real world, she always comes crashing back in eventually. That’s really not me.
When it comes to ACTUALLY camping… well, it’s hot… and there are bugs… and I can’t sleep on the ground… and, well, dude, even in my fantasy me, I can’t even imagine taking a dump in the woods… Just, no… way too much Catholic upbringing to even go there. Plus, you know, “getting out in the woods and throwing some soy patties on the fire”, it doesn’t quite have the ring to it.
But that girl in the Jeep is so cool… I am still drawn to the fantasy. I will occasionally even get so far as almost mentioning a camping trip to the SB. That’s the point at which I usually do a reality check… reality is good as squashing these little impulses. Really.
Ironically, what prompted this post wasn’t a desire to go camping. But that “me” I described above has been around a mite longer than the “me” that got me thinking about “her” (sorry, there, tortured pronouns).
The latest fantasy me has a vegetable garden. Maude have mercy, that’s even less likely to happen than the camping girl.
A vegetable garden, from which I gather produce, and cook (Hah!) healthsome foods, and, you know, like, CAN stuff and whatnot.
And why not toss in a compost pile. And I could have chickens too! For eggs!
I tried to grow vegetables once. I think I got one squash. Yes, that is correct. I was not even capable of growing squash. And what the heck would I do with a bunch of vegetables? I don’t like tomatoes. Not really a big fan of green beans. Don’t like peppers. Only eat squash and zucchini on a very rare basis. I really, honestly, DO NOT EAT those things that can reasonably be grown by an amateur gardener. I eat broccoli. And, again with the soy patties. And what the heck would I do with either chickens OR their eggs? I don’t eat them (well, eggs occasionally).
But there’s all this “go local” stuff being bandied about and “green living” etc. So thence comes this imaginary person who could grown and cook her own sustenance.
These fantasies have gotten me into trouble before. But handily, I am a little better at the impulse control now that I am older and wiser. Every time one of these ridiculous little ideas pops into my head, I just remember the fish tank and the fish pond (sorry, I know I blogged those, but I think they were on another blog from another life – trust me, though, both ended up badly and WENT AWAY).
So now anything that has “Bad Idea Bear” written all over is classified as “Fish” as in “Step AWAY from the fish”.
Still… Jeeps are so awesome. Maybe if I could just find the right tent…
