But I made it MY bitch.
OK… So yeah, that’s a bit over the top, but I am through it and feeling better.
The cold turkey method of quitting Derby is painful, as evidenced by my previous posts… But now that it’s done, I can see that it was definitely the way to go.
The first couple of weeks were bad… But as I have talked with other retirees (quitters), I think it’s a pretty typical span of misery. Now that it’s been 4? 5? Weeks… I am fully recovered and able to see that my life is freer and belongs to me more now that I have shaken that derby addiction.
Make no mistake… Talk to any derby girl… It IS like an addiction. It becomes who you are… Sucks up all your time… And keeps you from pretty much all other obligations.
Of course, you are totally willing to put up with that because it’s super fun and makes you feel like queen of the world when it’s going well.
Hmmm… I’ve never done heroin… But the similarities seem uncanny
The thing I really needed was some perspective, which I got in the form of a business trip to NYC. Being alone is good for me sometimes. I need that kind of thing to step outside myself and see what the heck my brain is doing to me.
In this case, I was like… Hey brain… You are being an idiot!
Or maybe I was just all hopped up on corned beef.
Either way, I came back from NYC in a much better head space.
I am having a great time trail running and paddle boarding.
Hoping to get more hiking in this summer.
I had forgotten how much I like being in the woods.
Now if I can just have things at work calm down, my life might belong only to me again!